It's swim suit season, and, after a very lazy spring, I've decided it's time to get back in shape and loose a few of my extra pounds. More importantly, I’m on a mission to gain control of my eating habits and develop a healthy exercise routine.
As a result, I have been hitting the gym pretty hard the past week. For the most part, I actually enjoy working out. There are many things I can list that I like about working out. I love finishing a workout and being completely drenched in sweat – it makes me feel as if I have accomplished something. I relish the post workout endorphin high I get after a long run. I appreciate a super tough cardio class that requires all my energy to finish the full 60 minutes. I love the fact that I sleep better each night. You get it – there are many things I enjoy about working out and going to the gym.
But let me share with a few things that I *do not* like about the gym..
1. The picture perfect, size zero suburbanites who come to the gym wearing a full face of makeup, hair perfectly pinned sporting the most pitiful excuse for workout clothes I have ever seen in my life. I mean honestly – since when do super tiny sports bras and teeny tiny spandex bike shorts that barely cover your bottom qualify as appropriate clothing? I know that you’re proud of perfectly sculpted butt and your super large chest (which BTW – no one believes those are real!) but there are children running around here – PUT SOME CLOTHES ON!
2. The cell phone obsessed, always obnoxious teenage girls who also refuse to wear proper shorts and shirt. I get it – you’re in l-o-v-e with Trevor. He’s super hot. And even though you just saw him fifteen minutes ago, it’s incredibly difficult to be away from him. But does that mean that you have to chat with him on your cell phone while running on the treadmill next to me? It’s bad enough that your thighs are the size of my arms and you insist on rolling your Sofie shorts up at least five times so we all can see your rear – but must you also ruin my super sweet workout mix by chatting up all lovey-dovey style with Trevor? Put down the cell phone and focus on your run – he’s probably going to dump you for some equally obnoxious/scantily clothed girl next week. At least you’ll have your health.
3. The dumb as a rock, “my biceps are so big they take all the oxygen from my brain prohibiting proper mental stimulation” men. I don’t get it. I think it’s great that you take weight lifting seriously and work hard for sculpted abs and arms. But some of them need to lay off the supplements and tanning beds. Once again, please, put on a proper t-shirt and gym shorts. No man should be caught in spandex shorts. EVER.
Despite my dislikes, I have gotten back into the whole gym routine, and, it feels pretty good.